The Urbаn Prophet™ 5.0

I'm the kind of guy who talks to himself.

I freely admit it, if you wanna label me a nutjob go ahead, do it. Thing is, I just can't help myself, I get stressed, upset, I start mumbling. When I'm deep i thought pondering some question that's been nagging at the edge of my thoughts, it sometimes just spills out into the real world. This can be quite embarassing at times, as I'm sure you can imagine.

Maybe it's because I think too much, or because I'm quite the lone wold, used to being by myself most of the time that I forget when people are aound that it's quite socially unacceptable to be babbling to yourself. Or it could also be that I'm quite soft spoken so sometimes when I'm talking to someone, they don't notice and I just continue on.

I read somewhere that talking to yourself is a good form of self-therapy. You kinda bring up issues you have without yourself, and talk it out until you find some kind of resolution. I have conversations with myself all the time, it's a throw-back from when i was a kid and didn't have that many playmates living near me. I'd go off into some imaginary romp complete with sound track and affects much to the consternation of my parents. "He has a healthy imagination you see...."

Even into my adulthood I still play little mind games with myself. I imagine myself in a movie and everything I do and say is just following the script. Or sometimes I tell myself little stories with me cast as the main protagonist. Sometimes these little fantasies escape into the real world and I blurt out a word. Usually, this happens when I'm alone or stuck somewhere with nothing else to do like if I was on the bus or the train. It does help with my writing though, half the stuff I write down is from these little ponderings.

"That is what all poets do: they talk to themselves out loud; and the world overhears them. But it's horribly lonely not to hear someone else talk sometimes."
George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950), Anglo-Irish playwright, critic

I do tend to find it easier to solve problems when i talk to myself. It's as if verbalising a question makes it 'real' enough for me to see all of its aspects until I can come up with a solution. Also, since I write as a hobby, I find that if I speak what i write out aloud it helps me form my thoughts better. The act of physically saying the words seems to add more weight and depth to my sentences, especially when it comes to my poems. I won't realise that it sounds like crap until I read it out.

Maybe I got deep rooted problems that are plaguing my psyche to the point where thoughts are hard to keep in my head and just have to get out somehow. Yeah I could be going nuts, or maybe even, I'm already nuts. Well, I leave it to you, true-believers, to decide, 'specially since you've been loyally reading my crap anyway. Passing thought, do thoughts become words only when you say them, or are they already words when they're still in your head?