There comes a point in every ones life when you have to make a hard decision.
Usually, the outcome of this decision affects more than just yourself, or if its just you, it affects you profoundly. These decisions are bitter and difficult to even think about let alone commit to. You find your self struggling to make a choice when both options seem so scary and unerving to you, that you don't even know where to begin. You fear that at a future date you will deeply regret what you've done, that choice you have made. Especially, if it involves another person. What do you do when you don't know what you're supposed to do? What do you do when you fear you will hurt, or be hurt regardless of the options? Toss a coin? Pray to god for an answer? You torture yourself senseless over the fact, thinking,
"what of this, what of that?" not knowing exactly which path to follow.
Karl Kraus, an old Austrian journalist once said,
"A weak man has doubts before a decision, a strong man has doubts afterwards." How easy life would be if everyone was as single-mindedly objective as Mr. Kraus. Saying that, we can learn from Mr. Kraus. A decision has to be viewed in a balanced manner, weighing both the pros and cons, when you find the most ideal solution,
make the decision, then worry about the consequences later. It is pointless to worry, if you do not execute. Most difficult decisions have to be taken with a pinch of faith and a taste bitterness. You have to swallow that bitter pill to make things right.
Saying all this, the worst possible decision a person could ever have to make, are those of the heart. For eventhough you know what you are doing is best for everyone involved, it still hurts. There is no pain greater than knowingly causing another person pain, and regretting not being able to stop it. I hurt because I know I have hurt and truly regret the fact that I have. Some decisions aren't easy, but they still have to be made.
"My basic principle is that you don't make decisions because they are easy; you don't make them because they are cheap; you don't make them because they're popular; you make them because they're right."Theodore Hesburgh
Who Invented the Hole in a
Doughnut?
First imported to the United States in the 17th century by Dutch pilgrims, the olykoek underwent a number of changes in characteristics before an American sea captain, Hanson Crockett Gregory, invented the now familiar hole in its center in 1847. After being re-imported to Europe for US troops during both World Wars, Gregory’s ring doughnut became the most recognizable form of an otherwise commonplace piece of fried dough.
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"For art to exist, for any sort of aesthetic activity to exist, a certain physiological precondition is indispensable: intoxication."
Friedrich Nietzsche
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The Sydney Morning Herald reported on it's web-site on the 19th of April that a Ms Obdulia Delgado held up traffic after she stopped her car on the on-ramp of the Kennedy Expressway, Chicago because, now get this, she saw a vision of the Holy Virgin Mary on the wall of the on-ramp (pictured above). Now apparently people are flocking to the onramp to get closer to god by laying flowers and offerings infront of the image. It's reached the point where the police have had to put up barricades to prevent people from driving and parking in the area.
Look at the image above, what do you see? Yes, to some I suppose you can see the Virgin Mary. Personally, I see a bottle of beer, ketchup bottle, a chess pawn, hell I'd go as far as saying that it looked rather phalic in nature, the
fresco de la dildo. Come on people, it's a stain! It's what happens when water seeps into and out of concrete. The human mind is programmed to see patterns, that's how we recognise faces. Any one looking at that blotch will see what ever they want to. Yes, some people might say it is just a stain, but the question is how did that stain take the shape that it's in? Well, it could be that a rather tall homeless man pees against that wall every morning. Now I'm not against religion or the catholic faith, but this harkens back to the middle ages when every small little church 'discovered' a holy relic. It reached the point where apparently Joseph had two thumbs on one hand since there were two chapels with the relic of his right thumb. If god wanted to show an image to the faithful, he wouldn't show it on the on ramp of the Kennedy Expressway, unless of course God gets some kind of sick pleasure from causing traffic jams....
People, wake up and get a grip, this is reality talking....
smh: A Virgin Vision? Apr 19, 2005
"Losing a game is heartbreaking. Losing your sense of excellence or worth is a tragedy."
Joe Paterno
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Hi All..
Seriously, I don't know why i keep playing Risk.
Fair enuff, I love the game. In fact it's one of my favourite board games. But seriously, how much punishment do i want receiving. I mean I've played the game for years, but I've never won a single game yet. Call me a sore loser why don't you. I was just finished off by my brother in-law again after an extensive round of the game includng copious ammounts of alcohol and my friends are now calling me well, a sore loser for sitting in my room and well, updating my blog but i just needed some time to reflect. Do I really want to put myself through this again? If I'm always losing doesn't this mean something? Maybe I was never meant to be a general. Maybe this is a case of sour grapes? If you keep losing at something, doesn't it mean you should throw in the towel and try something else? Maybe I'm being a sour loser. I don't know, what i do know is that I don't want to keep hurting myself. Yes, I'm a sensitive soul and I do not like losing. Maybe I should start playing another game that doesn't involve chance so much. I don't know, after four consecutive double ones (lowest role in the game) which by the way is the norm for me in games like this, it means I've got shit luck and should be more conservative with the things i do. I don't know, I think I'm gonna stay of things that involve to much chance and stick with things that are more certain and safe. Yes, I admit I know I'm a sore loser. But i also know i don't like losing, well not all the time at least, I don't need this for my shaky ego.............
Man all this introspection over a stupid game. To the Ancient Greeks, the sorst thing that could happen to you, was if you lost or admitted defeat. It brought shame to you and your family. They would rather die than lose in a game. Of course, this would be during the Olympics or when they were at war. Well this isn't the Olympics so I suppose i should be more laid back and not take these things so seriously. After all it's just a bloody game...
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Be the first one on your block to enjoy the high esteem and praise of your neighbours.
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"Many African leaders refuse to send their troops on peace keeping missions abroad because they probably need their armies to intimidate their own populations."
Kofi Annan
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I've noticed the past few days I've been postting humorous stuff on my blogs. Well, I suppose it's because this past week I've been more or less in high spirits. A lot of interesting things have evolved since last tuesday and well, I suppose I should make the best of it. When your up you should try to stay up, or at least for as long as possible. The hotel project, the gym, everything has resolved for the better. Of course, I still haven't won the bid for the franchise but at least now i know i will be capable of investing into something at least. Anyway, not to stop a good thing, here are some particularly funny nursery rhymes I've discovered along the way...
Mary had a little skirt
with splits right up the sides
and every time that Mary walked
the boys could see her Thighs
Mary had another skirt
twas split right up the front
...but she didn't wear that one very often
Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
between two chunks of bread.
Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman,
What have you got in there?
Said the Pieman unto Simon,
Pies, you dickhead.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings horses and all the kings men,
Said 'F*ck him, He's only an egg.
Mary had a little lamb
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's ass
and turned it's wool to nylon
Georgie Porgy pudding and pie.
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too, cause he was gay.
Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
When she bent over
Rover took over,
And gave her a bone of his own.
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"And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you."
Friedrich Nietzsche - Philosopher
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A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. This being a big event, the girl tells her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and "do it" for the first time. Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never done it before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some protection. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about protection and doing it. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many he'd like to buy; a 3-pack, a 10-pack, or a family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be very busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parent's house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in." The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy still deep in prayer with his head down. Ten minutes pass and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to her boyfriend, "I had no idea you were so religious." The boy turns and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."
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What is the fastest game on Earth?
The fastest projectile speed in any moving ball game is approximately 302 km/h in Jai-Alai. This compares with around 270 km/h for a golf ball driven off a tee. The word Jai-Alai actually means "merry festival" in Basque and professional Jai-Alai in America started in Miami in 1926. The game originated in the Basque area of Spain's Pyrenees Mountains over 300 years ago.
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Yes, Finally.
After a week of thinking about what the fuck to do with my life and how to get my shit started, I've come up with a half-way decent plan.
Remember that blog i posted about a week back? All about me getting my act together mind, body and financially? Well, so far body wise I've been keeping to the program, though i gotta control my diet better. Mind wise, well, so far I've read 4 books and been reading the newspapers to keep me updated on the world. Coincidentaly, my dad arranged for me to meet up with a few people, potential investors, to set up a hotel in a popular tourist destination in Melaka. Anyway, managed to extract an agreement from them and now with the cash in hand we're bidding for the franchise. If we win the bid, my finances are sorted for the time being.
Our chances looks good though, and we should be starting operations come August or so. Apart from that, I gotta find a part time job for now to maintain my liquidity until that time. If you remember one of my posts from last week, it was then when i decided to seriously sort out my life rather then just moan about it. The funny thing is, as soon as i put my mind to it, I suddenly noticed this opportunity. I suppose opportunity always knocks, but it's your prerogative to listen for it.
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"Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. Of course, I could be wrong."
Terry Pratchett
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CD-ROM: Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN: It Still Does Nothing
SCSI: System Can't See It
MIPS: Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
DOS: Defunct Operating System
WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
OS/2: Obsolete Soon, Too
PnP: Plug and Pray
APPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
IBM: I Blame Microsoft
DEC: Do Expect Cuts
MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
CA: Constant Acquisitions
COBOL: Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
LISP: Lots of Insipid and Stupid Parentheses
MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
AAAAA: American Association Against Acronym Abuse.
WYSIWYMGIYRRLAAGW: What You See Is What You Might Get If You're Really Really Lucky And All Goes Well.
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"The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair."
Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless
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1. Timing.
Timing is everything. Ensure that your employer is not engaged in any other matters before you approach him. If he is distracted by something which he or she considers more important then he will not pay any attention to you and your words will not be heard. Make sure that your employer isn't distracted, and has ample free time on his hands to listen to your concern. If your employer is the busy type and is constantly unavailabe, try bribing his secretary to get her to put you into his diary, you may even try sleeping with her. If that is not possible, abducting and locking his ten o'clock appointment in the broom closet would do just fine.
2. Location
Location is also important. When approaching your boss to ask for a raise consider where would be most appropriate. Ideally, the location should be a neutral, non-threatening place where both of you would feel comfortable to open up to each other. This could be in a restaurant, a bar, or even a park. Take on him on a trip to the zoo or to the movies. Unfortunately if you keep doing this your co-workers may think that you're sleeping with him so most likely you'd have to do ist somewhere in the office. Wherever it is you meet him, make sure that you're alone, last thing you want is to have an audience as that may become distracting to both you and your boss.
3. Bringing Up the Matter of a Raise
Now that the moment is right and the place is ideal, how do you bring up the matter of the raise? Ideally he should now what the meeting is about prior to it happening. One way is to send him an e-mail regarding that you wish to have a 'performance appraisal' so you wouldn't have to worry about this. Depending on your boss you may not wish to do this for it may give him to much time to think of he shouldn't give you a raise. So surprise him. Bring it up in a matter of fact way and see what his reaction is. If he starts laughing it may be taken as a bad sign of things to come. Equally so if you see any of his veins bulge out and start throbbing in an unusual manner.
4. Arguing Your Point
Be strong and assertive. Tell him why you deserve a raise don't fall into the trap of trying to prove you need a raise. You know you deserve it. Show him on paper your contribution was to the company. Argue how you are so desireable elsewhere that the competition is knocking dow your door trying to get you to leave to them. Show him how his company would fail without you. How he is so lucky to have you in the first place that he should be kissing your feet and throwing rose petals over your path. His first born child should be named after you, or if he or she already has a name, he/she should be re-named after you. All this, I'm sure you realise, are lies. Which brings us to our next point.
5. Lying About How Important You Are
It is important to remember that when you lie that you don't change your story half-way. Also, a lie is best if it has some element of truth in it. Always make sure your arse is covered. If you get caught in a lie, it can be quiet embarassing if not potentially damaging. A good lie is a simple lie. Though if you're trying to show how spectacular you are when all you've done since you started work at the organisation was to develop a better way to arrange paper clips then complexity may be key. Forge paper work, or if you're to lazy, plagiarise other peoples paperwork, to show how much work you've put out. Take credit from other peoples projects by association. Another good way is to exagerate the importance of your work, if you can somehow convince your boss that your new method making paper airplanes has saved the company over $25k then you've won half the battle.
6. Putting Your Colleagues Down
Say you know you can't convince your boss that you deserve on the merit of your work alone regardless of the lies you have told so far, then what do you do? Your boss can only call you useless if your colleagues are noticebly more useful then you. It all boils down to a frame of reference, your boss looks at how you measure up to your colleuges so it is essential that you put them down first before they make you look bad. If everyone 'seems' more useless then you and you are the star achiever at the office, then how can he deny you your raise?
7. Threaten to Leave
Tell him if he doesn't give you a raise you'll leave. This may have some undesireable affects if so far you've had to relly on steps 5 & 6, namely he'll let you leave. So only do this if you know you have a platform to stand one as this should be an almost last resort.
8. Offer Sexual Favours
This usually works if your boss is of the opposite sex, or sometimes the same. This has a high success rate an is usually quite affective. Though the one drawback would be that your boss might expect you to make good on your promise after you get that raise.
9. Kidnap a Member of His Family
Kidnapping a member of his family is another way to get him to agree to give you a raise. It would be seen as very assertive and since it normally takes more then one person to kidnap another person, you would be showing good leadership techniques if you pull the kidnapping off well. Make sure, however, that you kidnap somebody he actually cares about. There's no point in kidnapping a mother in law he doesn't like. Though if you look at it another way, if you disposed of her quietly he might atill give you that raise.
10. Threaten to Cause Yourself Bodily Harm
Tell him you'll hurt yourself if he doesn't give you a raise. This will work best if you've got a good working relationship with him. Again this may have undesireable results as your boss may then ask to assist you in causing yourself bodily harm especially if you just kidnapped a member of his family.
If All else Fails:
11. Threaten to Cause Him Bodily Harm
Nothing gets attention, answers and agreement then the immediate threat of pain. This is best done if you have a weapon, use the lamp on his desk, or his letter opener. Avoid unwieldy objects like a large chair or items that are to heavy as even though it might look threatening, he knows you don't have enough room to swing it. The best option is to think ahead and bring a weapon in with you. Firearms generally are the best option and he'll definitely agree to give you a raise if you bring one of those in with you. But then again he'd most likely agree that he is also a dancing polar bear and he likes to wear green tutu's if you asked him.
Wow, never thought anyone took cartoons so seriously.
This is an interesting read and i sure as hell wished I was the one who had written it!
Check it out!
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"Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom."
Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970), Unpopular Essays (1950), "Outline of Intellectual Rubbish"
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Which oldest republic in the world?
Switzerland. It is also the only country in the world to have a square flag. Well now you know...
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Ahhh... Another lazy tuesday, or is wednesday? I forget...
Well, I've finally recovered from my holiday and decided to quit brooding about being jobless... I'm starting my hunt afresh, there must be someone out there who'll hire me, surely...
Found a few interesting prospects in the papers yesterday, a marketing position for a medium sized group of nightclubs. More or less similar to what i was doing when i was up in london, and i've decided to apply.. This'll only be my 120th application so far, 23rd by mail, the rest on-line...
I've drawn up a wee time table for meself on how i'll spend my week whilst i'm still in my period of unemployment. 6 days of gym (what else is new) all evenings, my mornings eill be reading the papers and applying for anything interesting and my afternoons will be dedicated to learning something new. When i get around to doing a computer copy of the timetable i'll be sure to post it just to bore the lot of you! ;-p
Risk
4:52 PM
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UrbanProphet
Whoah! I just re-read my last post... Seemed darker then usual but then again i was under the influence of quite a wee bit of alcohol last night when i wrote it. A few friends popped by last night for a quiet get together where we all sat down and played 'Risk'. Great game, really, it is. What with all the plotting and politicking, shady deals and hidden agendas, it was much like real life.
Anyway, it was great evening, though i'm sure some of you are like,"what u sat down and played a board game? Boring!". Well, if that's you're attitude then go away and read someone elses blog! ;-p Really, all of u who haven't played the game, go to the shop, pick up a set, invite your closest chums over and be ready for oh, only 6 to 7 hours of great heated strategy. Trust me after the first hour or so, things will get personal, and that's where the true fun is...
"Risk comes from not knowing what you're doing."
Warren Buffett
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Phineas saved from his harpies
Hi all...
I'm back in KL.
Wow, it was real good over in Jakarta, managed to clear my head out real good n cogitate on what i should do next with my life. For those of you ho aren't in the know, well, so far in the past six months I've gone into 3 jobs, lost 4, migrated, left 1 relationship and now I'm in another, got myself interviewed in a local magazine (full four page spread! of course there were 5 other people with me), gone on holiday and came back and recently got diagnosed with leukoplakia which is a precancerous lesion in my mouth... Scary...
So many things has happened to me in barely 6 months more then say in the past 3 years... The lesion, though it sounds scary, is considered precancerous as it roughly has a 3% chance of turning into cancer. Not much, but still...
Anyway, 6 months. So many things, so many places, so many things to think about, so many things to consider. I still don't have a permanent job at the moment, my application with that big bank is still being 'processed'. Everything in mylife is telling me to wait but at the same time it's telling me i'm running out of time, running out of space. I've got so many things that needs to be done yet so many things are holding me back. Well, I suppose that's life, c'est la vie...
Right now I'm living on the good will and love of others, for which i am truly grateful for but this is something I'd rather not endure. I feel like my life has been taken away from, that i have no control over what i do or what happens to me. Truly, this is scary, this is very scary. I have no direction, no aim, no goal, no destination known. Hmm... So many things i've had to think and ponder about.
All the way since my return, i've been told to but listen and to follow though i have been led many a times to many dead ends. Yet no matter what i do, it seems to be be out of my control, I am always depending on some factor or someone, or something, in order to reach that which i desire. Yet led am i, to follow blindly down paths unknown to me, unwanted by me but dragged am i to destinations unknown. I suppose that is but life, c'est la vie.
Anyway, this job that i want has been dangling infront of me just out of reach, but like Phineus i am left wanting as it is pulled away from me when it seems almost but in reach. "Wait, we'll tell you soon." If they were to but tell me that it's over and done with I would sleep easier in my bed.
But enough of moaning and complaining, one has to make do with what one has and strive to better himself regardless of what obstruction there may be. Unlike Phineus, no hero or heroine will come to my save me for i must save myself, as in truth, i am but my own harpy. At times i feel though that i just can't let go for fear of what my lay ahead, i fear to strive forward. Auribus teneo lupum. I hold a wolf by the ears, meaning i feel i'm in a dangerous situation and i dare not let go. Alas, let go i must and forge my way forward. My harpies will not leave me alone and will mock me every step i take, belittle my every move, but i will go onwards, i will.
My plan is to first control myself. My body, my habits and my mind. Physical exercise leads to strength of body and confidence in oneself. Control of ones habits, is integral to the sucess of both the forer and the latter. It instils discipline, and without discipline all achievements are moot and are not of any consequence as they could never be replicated, ergo no progress could ever be made. Exercise of ones mind by learning and the arts, developes the mental tools necessary to achieve anything of any consequence. Without which ones mind would stagnate, and this stagnation would, as with any dinosaur of thought or body, lead to extinction. Once I have control of myself, I will have control of my harpies. Once I have control of my harpies, I would have nothing to fear but fear itself to paraphrase Roosevelt.
Step 2 would be to take control of my financial situation. I will not go in to this as well, this is a public billboard and i will not broadcast all my secrets... ;-) But with financial stability and piece of mind and body, I will be able to move forward. Some might say I should include spiritual progress into to my plans, but well really, when the chips are down, earth and blood is what but matters, the soul will find it's own way as god helps those who helps themselves.
Eitherways, this has bee a long blog and the hour is quite late. Suffice to say in Appolonius' retelling of the Argonauts, Phineas represents all of us, life is but a trial of mind and body, it will mockingly present you with what seems to be the impossible as the harpies tortures phineas with the chance of something that but turned to nothing. It is only through wit and wisdom you can capture you're own harpies and set yourself free as Phinues was free to live life without persecution. For surely, that is what we all wish for, to be free?
Well it's been over a week here in Jakarta for me.
As i said yesterday, today I'm going off to Puncak Pass which lies in the foothills of the mountains surrounding Jakarta. It's going to be a long drive though but I can't wait to go. Been getting pretty much stir crazy these past few days. Now that my stomachs' sorta settled down, I feel it's time for me to be a bit adventurous again.
Anyway, for me being a Malaysian, it's kinda weird being in Jakarta. No offence to any Indonesians out there, but Jakarta feels like it is in some strange parallel universe to Kuala Lumpur. Everything feels and looks so familiar then all of a sudden all of it just goes so different. It's like the two cities were the same and then at one point in time they split off onto different paths. Saying that, Jakarta is way older then K.L., almost 150 years older then it if i'm not mistaken. Might be even older.
Anyway, enough blabbering... Going off to Puncak now, will update my blog again when i get back. Take care true believers.
"I was brought up to believe that how I saw myself was more important than how others saw me."
Anwar el-Sadat, late President of Egypt (1918-1981)
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I've been a bad bad person for neglecting my true believers out there.
Sorry my beloved public, but I've been away out of the country for the past week. Yes, true believers, the Prophet has left the country. Well, only for a wee while that is. My mum dropped by a week ago and decided that she wanted to drag aher 'lil boys ass over to Jakarta and spend a week with her and me dad seeing that I've got all the free time in the world at the moment. So far, I've had a lot of fun but seriously, this holidaying is making a mess of my gym schedule and i need to go home soon. My mum told me, "oh you can use our gym" but that was just a ploy to get me here. Now that i'm here i find out i need to be signed in by someone who's a member (my mum, dad or my brother) and pay a fee to use the gym. I'd be willing to pay but no one wants to follow and sign me in... *sob*
My diets gone right out the window so far, my mum can't seem to cook enough food for me and bless her, but she keeps stuffing me silly every meal and i really can't take it anymore. Anyway, so far I went on a day trip to Anyer last Sunday and managed to pick up some food poisoning while i was there. Did manage to see the growing remains of krakatoa, you know, that volcano that killed like a million people 100 years ago. The next few days saw me rolling around in bed in agony. It was like my body was confused, on the first day everything wanted to come out one way, then on the second day it all came out the other end, now finally, nothing wants to come out at all... Whoopie for me....
Anyway, I did visit a few malls in between purges and they were well, like malls every where else... Pretty much boring... Tomorrow though i'm in for a treat though. I'll be going of to a place called Bogor up in the highlands surrounding Jakarta. They've got an excellent wild life park, huge with loads of animals and the last time i went there (oh 15 odd years ago) an elephant charged the car we were in, now that... was a lot of fun!
I'll update you all on my progress tomorrow, that's if my brother lets me use his computer again... Hopefully... God willing... So you all take care, have fun and remember... If you end up in some strange little village cafe in some 3rd world country, what ever you do, do not drink anything that has ice in it... It feels a whole lot better straight outta the can, or else you'll end up in the can if you know what i mean... Constantly... Then you can't go at all... *sniff*
