Darn it! I woke up 1hr and 1/2 earlier this morning as i wanted to go to the gym before i went to the office. I was supposed to have left the house by 6.30 am but instead it was a little passed 7am by the time i managed to be already to leave. That with the jam going into KL this morning meant that i arrived just a little to late to go to the gym yet to damn early to be in the office. Realising i had noithing else better to do i decided, "well what the heck, might as well go in early today." There was no here apart from the cleaning lady who almost had a heart attack when she saw me, as usually i walk in 10 minutes late. She was all, "are you ok, what's wrong, why are you here so early?" She wouldn't take my reasons so now is convinced that something truly and utterly horrible happened to me or someone around me sometime this morning, automobile pile up on the motorway, abduction by aliens, murder, that kind of thing....
Well, anyway just before i went up to the office this morning, as i parked my car, i saw a bunch young guys with weird hair and shiny clothes which were obviously polyester, holding hands just outside the car-park. I was all "whoah, hang on, what's going on here?". They were all pasty coloured with wild eyes and one of them was drooling slightly. "Nice" I thought, so being the macho body-building athlete that i am, i stayed in my car and whimpered slightly while making sure all the doors were locked. Then i saw a couple appear out of nowhere, which apparently were the people these boys were waiting for as they got all excited and started hugging each other. Looking at the young lass and her beau i thought "my god, zombies exist!", but then i realised her jaw was moving up and down in a rabid stuccato motion on some poor piece of gum in her mouth. It then dawned on me who these people were and why they were all holding hands plus why they had an over abbundance of affection for each other: they were all 'E'-ed of their tits! They were so monstrously mangled that they had only just now finished partying out the New Year! It's bloody Monday and New Year finished 3 days ago! Whoah! Why don't I ever get invited to parties like that! Then again, I never get invited to orgies either but maybe that's because to the youth of today, I'm about as cool as a wet fish.
*Sigh* There was a time when i walked out of clubs around the same time as these lot, had a a two hour nap and was ready to do it all over again. The last time i tried that, I was in bed for two days and kept getting cramps. Times really have changed and now it feels like my body is trying to get back at me for all the crap i put it through when i was younger. Well sine i started my exercise regimen and diet plan, it has been slightly more forgiving. It's easier now for me to walk up stairs, i can get out of my chair un-aided and with all the veggies i've been having I go like clockwork two times a day. However with all this extra protein i've been eating, it's been causing me to have farts you'd never believe. Apparently it has something to do with all the extra nitrogen in the meat i'm consuming. It's supposed to mean i'm healthy, but oh-my-god i tell you, I almost knocked myself out when i was driving to work this morning. Thank god i was alone, otherwise i might have been accused of attempted murder with a deadly weapon! Well, God is fair, he gives and he takes, but boy have i been giving out... Anyway, Happy New Year to all of you and take care... I gotta do some work already.....
Well, anyway just before i went up to the office this morning, as i parked my car, i saw a bunch young guys with weird hair and shiny clothes which were obviously polyester, holding hands just outside the car-park. I was all "whoah, hang on, what's going on here?". They were all pasty coloured with wild eyes and one of them was drooling slightly. "Nice" I thought, so being the macho body-building athlete that i am, i stayed in my car and whimpered slightly while making sure all the doors were locked. Then i saw a couple appear out of nowhere, which apparently were the people these boys were waiting for as they got all excited and started hugging each other. Looking at the young lass and her beau i thought "my god, zombies exist!", but then i realised her jaw was moving up and down in a rabid stuccato motion on some poor piece of gum in her mouth. It then dawned on me who these people were and why they were all holding hands plus why they had an over abbundance of affection for each other: they were all 'E'-ed of their tits! They were so monstrously mangled that they had only just now finished partying out the New Year! It's bloody Monday and New Year finished 3 days ago! Whoah! Why don't I ever get invited to parties like that! Then again, I never get invited to orgies either but maybe that's because to the youth of today, I'm about as cool as a wet fish.
*Sigh* There was a time when i walked out of clubs around the same time as these lot, had a a two hour nap and was ready to do it all over again. The last time i tried that, I was in bed for two days and kept getting cramps. Times really have changed and now it feels like my body is trying to get back at me for all the crap i put it through when i was younger. Well sine i started my exercise regimen and diet plan, it has been slightly more forgiving. It's easier now for me to walk up stairs, i can get out of my chair un-aided and with all the veggies i've been having I go like clockwork two times a day. However with all this extra protein i've been eating, it's been causing me to have farts you'd never believe. Apparently it has something to do with all the extra nitrogen in the meat i'm consuming. It's supposed to mean i'm healthy, but oh-my-god i tell you, I almost knocked myself out when i was driving to work this morning. Thank god i was alone, otherwise i might have been accused of attempted murder with a deadly weapon! Well, God is fair, he gives and he takes, but boy have i been giving out... Anyway, Happy New Year to all of you and take care... I gotta do some work already.....
2 comments:
HAhahaha... dat bit bout d fart is damn funny! Uh oh! Hope i won't b in d car wit u n monkey having a farting spree! Ack!
Not to worry, I'll try to keep myself together...